Saturday of the 7th Week of Eastertide
Acts 28:16-20, 30-31
Jn 21:20-25
“…what does it matter to you? You are to follow me.“
I am in a small online Catholic study with a wonderful group of women, all over 60 yrs of age or so, in a similar place in life. We met in person for years, then when COVID-19 invaded the world, we decided to Zoom (for a few weeks until we flattened the curve. If only!). Since Easter, we have been reading, reflecting, learning and sharing from The Little White Book (a small Eastertide ‘sister’ book to the Lenten Little Black Book).
This week, the daily focus has been on Peter’s relationship with Jesus. We all know Peter to be a rollercoaster ride in his following of Christ — he certainly shows us what it is like to be on the mountaintop of faith, committed belief and trust, and suddenly in the valley of flesh following his feelings. So, the daily reflections have given us a lively and insightful look at Peter – and ourselves.
I realised, during the year of my weekly 19th Annotation with my Spiritual Director, that I had some things in common with Peter. It is so easy for me to fall into the flesh and question God because I am putting my eyes on myself and others, ‘look what she has… look what they get to do… look where they are going… look what I could/should have too, if if if…’ I am, in fact, doing the opposite of what Christ instructs His followers to do when I am concerning myself with the lives/gifts of others instead of following/focusing on Him. And this week, I’ve been convicted more and more about this sin in my life; especially in connection to another book I am reading, PRAYER EVERYWHERE The Spiritual Life Made Simple by Fr. Gary Caster. Fr. Caster shares how he frames his day praying 5 simple things based on his friendship with, and guidance from, Mother Teresa.
- Good morning, Jesus! (Mother Teresa – adds, “Come walk the earth in me.” So I do, too!)
- I give You permission today to spoil me with your love.
- I say ‘YES’ to all that is expected of me today and ‘YES’ to all that’s unexpected.
- I expect You to punctuate my day with signs of Your presence.
- Thank You!
For #3 above, telling God I say ‘YES’ to all that the new day will hold for me, combined with Peter saying he will 100% ‘follow Jesus’ — and the recorded reality of his falling down in following Jesus over and over, brought about a personal revelation. How can I honestly be following Jesus closely when I am concerned with the walk/life/gifts of others ?
I am grateful, and throughout the day say over and over, “Thank you, Jesus”, for so much good in my life; little things like a reading a good book, a great forehand in tennis, a refreshing sunshine and breezy day, a sweet text from my daughter or a friend, my husband surprising me with making dinner, and, of course the big things too! I am grateful for what I ‘have’; but I realised that I hold onto the things I THINK I could/should have (compared to others – aha, looking around and concerning myself with another life instead of the one God has given me) on a weekly (I hope not daily) basis. (Yikes – don’t you hate it when you ask God to give you awareness of your sins, and then He does?!) It’s almost like the Holy Spirit directed today’s gospel just for me! I know that is a shared experience, and what I am now praying on a daily basis, “God, I expect You to punctuate my day with signs of your presence.”
So, as the Easter season concludes in our liturgical calendar, I am determined to frame each day as Fr. Caster has taught me. To look daily, more intently, for signs of God’s presence; to hear more clearly, the beckoning of the Holy Spirit, to be so attuned to knowing Christ is closer to me than my own skin — that I speak to Him throughout the day at all times, in all places — about any and all things. That I concern myself daily with following Him and walking the path that our Father has for me.
(Today’s OXYGEN by Gina Ulicny)
Prayer: Father God, I desire to follow You with every step, in every word. I ask for immediate awareness when I am concerning myself with others instead of with You.
Thanksgiving: Thank You, Lord, for the example of St. Peter, a flawed man who changed the world when he concerned himself with only Christ. Thank you for the faith that guides me to do the same.
OXYGEN 
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