15 June, Saturday — ‘Yes’ means Yes, ‘No’ means No.

Saturday of Week 10 in Ordinary Time

1 Kgs 19:19-21
Mt 5:33-37

“You must not break your oath, but must fulfil your oaths to the Lord.”

Rejoice! Pope Francis is visiting Singapore. A grand eucharistic celebration is planned for 12 September. A magnificent 1600-strong choir will sing beautifully for mass. All choirs in Singapore will participate. 

In my 11.30 am choir group chat, the news generated strong initial enthusiasm. 70% registered their names in the combined church choir (places were limited). Then the rehearsal schedules and rules of participation were released. It entailed a real commitment of time, punctuality and attendance over 3 months. The message ended by giving all participants a final chance to think carefully – ‘Yes’ or ‘No’. 

In today’s gospel reading, Jesus states clearly – Yes means Yes, No means No. There is no need to swear a vow to mean what you say. This simple message strikes me deeply. The longer I live, the less my answers mean what they say. Most of the time, it occurs in ‘mundane’ everyday situations. Easier to give the less difficult answer first and then not do it, or give some last minute excuse. No harm done really. In fact, everyone I know do it quite often. It is a way of life.

10 years ago, I was retrenched and became an insurance agent. I embraced a whole new world of being self employed. The perks are facing rejection everyday and being the least popular person among friends! Nevertheless, the one benefit in my job is it helped me to be decisive. I now state clearly my answer to anything at the start, and stick to it 80% of the time. My better self is due to frustrating experiences of being stood up for meetings and appointments. Being truthful matters and will prevent painful consequences in the future. 

A few years ago, I met a couple that was getting married. They had been together for almost 8 years and were expected to make the next step. Somehow, I sensed a distinct apathy from the groom throughout our two meetings are they were doing financial planning. Sadly, the marriage did not last more than a year. He left the wife to be with someone else. I found out later that he went along with the wedding due to family pressures and did not want to say ‘NO’. Most painful indeed.

The first reading reinforces this theme to mean what you say or act. It tells how Elijah met Elisha in the fields and threw his cloak around him before walking away. This action signified that Elisha was to be his disciple and successor. No words were spoken, but an answer was required. Elisha accepted the task completely. He gave up everything in his life! He kissed his parents (to tell them he will not see them again) and disposed all his belongings to run after Elijah. ‘Yes’ means a total, committed Yes! 

As I finish writing this reflection, several of my 11.30 am choir members have pulled out of the papal choir. I know they would like to sign up, but understand the significance of their answer. ‘No’ means No this time.

(Today’s OXYGEN by Andrew Sia)

Prayer: Lord, we pray for the success of Pope Francis’ visit to Singapore and his celebration of Mass.

Thanksgiving: Thank you Lord, for the gift of your simple message to mean what we say and do.