21 November, Thursday — Anger Management

Nov 21 – Memorial for the Presentation of the Blessed Virgin Mary

Today, we commemorate the presentation of the Blessed Virgin as a child in the Temple where, according to tradition, she was educated. The feast originated in the Orient probably about the seventh century, and is found in the constitution of Manuel Comnenus (1166) as a recognized festival. It was introduced into the Western Church in the 14th century, abolished by Pope Pius V, but re-established by Sixtus V in 1585. Its observance by the Society of the Sacred Heart of Jesus as the day of their origin led to the devotion of Mater Admirabilis (Mother Most Admirable).

• Patron Saint Index

Apo 5:1-10
Lk 19:41-44

“If you in your turn had only understood on this day the message of peace! But alas, it is hidden from your eyes!”

Two years ago, I began to see someone to help me with ‘anger management’.  

I grew up in a conservative, patriarchal household. When I was 16, my father had a triple bypass heart operation. Though we didn’t have a label for it at the time, I now realize that dad fell into depression during his long recovery. He would go into fits of rage, for seemingly no reason, and lash out at all of us. It was so bad, my mother would give us what she called ‘The Weather Report’ when we got back from school, so we could be mentally prepared for him. Some days it would be ‘cloudy, with scattered storms’. When he was in a rage, it would be ‘thunder and lightning with gale force winds’. Very rarely was it ever ‘sunny, with only occasional showers’.

In Dante’s ‘Divine Comedy’, those who commit the sin of wrath are doomed to spend eternity in a marsh with other angry souls. There they fight, claw and spit at each other. No one is able to leave the marsh though. It is as if they’ve abandoned clear judgment and become incapacitated by their rage.

At its crux, the concept of Sin is Man’s refusal of God’s invitation to choose the way of good. When we continuously and deliberately choose the way of Sin, our judgment is clouded, and like the souls trapped in the marsh of wrath, we are stuck in a hell of our own making. The way back to God and peace is obscured to us.

So why did I seek help with ‘anger management’? They say women marry men who remind them of their fathers. It is certainly true in my case. My husband suffered from fits of rage as well. I think of it as a sickness, like my father’s battle with post op depression. And having been through it once before, I knew that there was a path out, a way to leave the marsh and return to God’s peace – and that way is through Love, Patience and Faith.

(Today’s OXYGEN by Sharon Soo)

Prayer: We pray for all families dealing with depression and other mental health issues. May God give them the strength to be the rock their loved ones need, even when things seem insurmountable.

Thanksgiving: We give thanks to God for connecting the dots forward for us, for preparing us in childhood and equipping us with the skills He knew we would need as adults.