25th Sunday in Ordinary Time
Isa 55:6-9
Phi 1:20-24,27
Mt 20:1-16
Christ will be glorified in my body, whether by my life or by my death. Life to me, of course, is Christ, but then death would bring me something more…
As I write this, I have cried countless tears for my beloved husband. I have weeped and wailed and knelt down in the most unexpected of places to render my prayers and sorrow because of the unpredictable and serious medical situation my husband is in.
In the face of life and death, I realise now that truly, our faith is tested and tried and proven true only in the hottest pits of the fire, the most crushing of crucibles, the most senseless of sufferings. This is the cross of love. A cross that is flanked and balanced in God’s eye between love and suffering — each being unable to exist without the other. Rather, each could not make sense without the other.
For what is love, without experiencing the torment of sharing this burden of extreme sorrow, pain and questions? Can one claim a deep sacrificial love be truly claimed without being accompanied by suffering? Indeed, can suffering be overcome without the most overpowering grace of deep, true, agape love?
This is the mystery that is life — both gift and tension in the living of it. When the cranks of gnashing teeth crunch down on me, and even the best of us, believe that you would likely want to bolt. I did. Yes, but hold on to your faith you must! And yet, do not doubt for a moment that you will never doubt.
In the first reading, the Prophet Isaiah cautioned us “Seek the Lord while he may be found, call him while he is near.” Let us never take the Lord’s mercy and love for granted. As a family, friends, and community beyond… countless friends and intercessors have cried out to our Lord — Save us / Save him Lord, we call upon your name!
And yet, within the same reading, Isaiah’s words ground me. It is by no coincidence that these words have been my reflection over only the last six tumbling days, where medical explanations are left wanting when confronted with the medical situation before us. What does one think or say or do, when doctors say they too cannot seem to find the answers? Can medical science explain everything? Are a team of brilliant human minds to be so confounded? Can reality be the marker for Truth? Facts may be what they are and what we see, but they never tell the whole and full Truth.
The Lord speaks:
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
nor are your ways my ways, says the LORD.
As high as the heavens are above the earth,
so high are my ways above your ways
and my thoughts above your thoughts.“
God, you speak. Speak now, your servant is listening.
The Psalmist sings in unison:
The Lord is near to all who call upon him.
The Lord is just in all his ways
and holy in all his works.
The Lord is near to all who call upon him,
to all who call upon him in truth.
As I reflect on the last six days of my life that suddenly became incomprehensible and topsy-turvy, I hold on to His omnipotent words that “My ways are above your ways, and my thoughts are above your thoughts.” And, really, I can only whisper this back in refrain… because indeed, what big and small mysteries daily confront us, especially even the ones we never even ponder and wonder much about — yet take for granted.
And with that, this ultimate Truth of a loving and forgiving and gracious God is that His word is last and final, and His words last beyond all time.
“Thus, the last will be first, and the first will be last.” Mt 20:16.
God, you accomplish your will for your glory. You are the Alpha and the Omega, You are great beyond imagination. You speak, and the world became. You lift a hand, and the heavens hang up their lights. And yet, look at us! A mere man is still the object of your desire and pursuit. A mere man is whom you direct all of your sacrificial, all-abandoning love to. You who would leave the 99 to go search for the lost one. And still more, you chose to come as a mere man to live and to die for us all. Tonight a mere man is crying out to you in surrender. Speak Lord, your servant is listening.
(Today’s OXYGEN by Debbie Loo)
Prayer: Save Us Lord, I call upon your name. Jesus, I trust in You. Hear my prayer! Jesus, have mercy on me, a sinner.
Thanksgiving: Thank you Father for your consolations and intimations. Thank you for your gift of time and mercy. Thank you for things yet unseen or unheard and unlived. Thank you for what I cannot, right now, thank you for.
OXYGEN 
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