12 December, Tuesday — Consolations, You Are Still His

Dec 12 – Memorial for Our Lady of Guadalupe

Guadalupe is, strictly speaking, the name of a picture, but the name was extended to the church containing the picture and to the town which grew up around the church. It makes the shrine, it occasions the devotion, it illustrates Our Lady. It is taken as representing the Immaculate Conception, being the lone figure of a woman with the sun, moon, and star accompaniments of the great apocalyptic sign with a supporting angel under the crescent. The word is Spanish Arabic, but in Mexico, it may represent certain Aztec sounds.

Its tradition is long-standing and constant, and in sources both oral and written, Indian and Spanish, the account is unwavering. The Blessed Virgin appeared on Saturday, 9 December 1531 to a 55-year-old neophyte named Juan Diego, who was hurrying down Tepeyac Hill to hear Mass in Mexico City. She sent him to Bishop Zumarraga to have a temple built where she stood. She was at the same place that evening and Sunday evening to get the bishop’s answer.

The bishop did not immediately believe the messenger, had him cross-examined and watched, and he finally told him to ask the lady who said she was the mother of the true God for a sign. The neophyte agreed readily to ask for the sign desired, and the bishop released him.

Juan was occupied all Monday with Bernardino, an uncle who was dying of fever. Indian medicine had failed and Bernardino seemed at death’s door. At daybreak on Tuesday 12 December 1531, Juan ran to nearby St. James’ convent to ask for a priest. To avoid the apparition and the untimely message to the bishop, he slipped round where the well chapel now stands. But the Blessed Virgin crossed down to meet him and said, “What road is this thou takest son?”

A tender dialogue ensued. She reassured Juan about his uncle, to whom she also briefly appeared and instantly cured. Calling herself “Holy Mary of Guadalupe”, she told Juan to return to the bishop. He asked for the sign he required. Mary told him to go to the rocks and gather roses. Juan knew it was neither the time nor the place for roses, but he went and found them. Gathering many into the lap of his tilma (a long cloak or wrapper used by Mexican Indians), he came back. The Holy Mother rearranged the roses, and told him to keep them untouched and unseen until he reached the bishop.

When Juan met with Zumarraga, Juan offered the sign to the bishop. As he unfolded his cloak, the roses, fresh and wet with dew, fell out. Juan was startled to see the bishop and his attendants kneeling before him. The life-size figure of the Virgin Mary, just as Juan had described her, was glowing on the tilma. The picture was venerated, guarded in the bishop’s chapel, and soon after, carried in procession to the preliminary shrine.

Painters have not understood the laying on of the colours. They have deposed that the ‘canvas’ was not only unfit but unprepared, and they have marvelled at the apparent oil, water, distemper, etc. colouring in the same figure. They are left in equal admiration for the flower-like tints and the abundant gold. They and other artists find the proportions perfect for a maiden of fifteen. The figure and the attitude are of one advancing. There is flight and rest in the eager, supporting angel. The chief colours are deep gold in the rays and stars, blue green in the mantle, and rose in the flowered tunic.

The clergy, secular and regular, have been remarkably faithful to the devotion towards Our Lady of Guadalupe, the bishops fostering it, even to the extent of making a protestation of faith in the miracle a matter of occasional obligation. Pope Benedict XIV decreed that Our Lady of Guadalupe should be the national patron, and made 12 December a holiday of obligation with an octave, and ordered a special Mass and Office.

• Patron Saint Index

Isa 40:1-11
Mt 18:12-14

“..it is never the will of your Father in heaven that one of these little ones should be lost.“

It is never a good feeling to be left out or left behind. I am certain no one hopes to be the odd one out, nor to be excluded and miss out on a good thing. I know I don’t. However, this experience can be more than just a negative feeling. It can turn to good for our growth and maturity, if we offer this up to our Lord.

A few days ago, I wrote a reflection about embarking on a silent retreat. I thought I would already be in the midst of it by now. Little did I know that I would be caught by the dreaded Covid bug and feel so ill (fevers, chills, the works) that I could not muster the energy to travel. I had to back out of the retreat and make the necessary cancellation calls with a very heavy heart. It took me a few hours to process my denial and disappointment. I had to accept my physical discomfort and understand that I could not reasonably do a retreat in a foreign land while being so sick. I was also advised by the retreat team to stay back at home to recover. Frankly, I felt really let down by God. I had prayed so hard to be protected from illness (despite caring for sick family members) and I truly expected God to help me make it to my retreat. I mean, God must know I’m doing this for Him right?

When I informed my travel companions that I would not be turning up, I truly felt like I was being left behind. I felt like that one lost sheep who’d gone off-track and I was grieving what I might miss out on. Why me and why, of all times, right now?

Well, the second Week of Advent isn’t focused on ‘Peace’ without good reason. After struggling with my disbelief then disappointment, I asked myself an honest question: Would God not turn up to be with me in my sick bed if I did not show up at the retreat? Was God only going to be present for the others at the retreat and forget all about me?

I knew in my head that the answer was, “Of course not!” But my heart took a while to catch up in feelings. As I closed my eyes to absorb the reality of staying home and allowing my tired body to rest in bed, a great sense of peace and surrender flooded my being. The tensed thoughts of ‘fighting against’ my illness melted away as I accepted that this place right here was where I am meant to be. The first reading of Isaiah 40:1-11 says:

”A voice cries, ‘Prepare in the wilderness
a way for the Lord
Make a straight highway for our God
across the desert.
Let every valley be filled in,
every mountain and hill be laid low.
Let every cliff become a plain,
and the ridges a valley;
then the glory of the Lord shall be revealed
and all mankind shall see it;
for the mouth of the Lord has spoken.’
[…]
Go up on a high mountain,
joyful messenger to Zion…
Shout without fear… ‘Hear is your God.’
Here is the Lord coming with power,
his arm subduing all things to him…
He is like a shepherd feeding his flock,
gathering lambs in his arms,
holding them against his breast
and leading to their rest the mother ewes.”

Rest, my child, rest up. Said the Lord to me, “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28). On the surface, it appeared that I was no longer going for the retreat (that I badly wanted).

But with eyes of faith and surrender, I finally admitted that God truly knew what I needed. He was not leaving me behind and only caring for the 99 sheep in the fold. In fact, He was meeting me (my whole self, body, mind, and soul) where I was, right here, in my sickness and inability to go anywhere. He is already here with me! But I could only see this clearly when I finally surrendered my own stubborn wishes to go away. “… it is never the will of your Father in heaven that one of these little ones should be lost.” (Matthew 18:14)

I know, I am always and already His, no matter where I go. And foolish as it may now seem, I did subconsciously reduce my God-experience to only the ‘event’ of the retreat, which I thought I needed and wanted. I am relieved to be ‘stuck’ at home and recuperating on my ‘home retreat’. I have been resting abundantly and the bodily discomfort has ironically liberated my mind and spirit to rest in Him.

Could you, like me, also be drawing a fence around the way that God should show up for you? Could this fence of expectations be keeping you outside the fold instead of opening up your heart to Him, wherever, whenever?

(Today’s OXYGEN by Debbie Loo)

Prayer: Father, help me to shed my biases about where and how I can seek you. Come to me and save me from the fences I have built around my stubborn desires. Help me to see clearly that You are already always with me.

Thanksgiving: Thank you for never leaving me behind. Thank you for always meeting me wherever I am.