Tuesday of the 5th Week of Eastertide
Acts 14:19-28
Jn 14:27-31
“…my own peace I give you, a peace the world cannot give…”
When you hear or see the word ‘healing’, what is the first image that comes to mind?
Is it one where people cry and are slain in the Holy Spirit during a healing rally? Or perhaps you imagine Jesus touching a blind or crippled man, and instantly, he is cured.
When I first saw a poster for the session at Church of St Ignatius titled ‘Receiving Inner Healing from Jesus: Reflecting on the Life of St Ignatius of Loyola and Our Lives’ by Fr Elton Fernandes, SJ, held on 18 April, I wondered, “Is this going to be something different from the healing rallies that I’ve attended in the past?”
And true enough, I caught a glimpse of His peace during the session.
In prayer, I found myself drawn to a soft watercolour painting of Jesus walking beside me. Gentle. Quiet. Unhurried. I brought to Him a wound that I have been carrying for years. I didn’t need to explain it perfectly or fix it. I just let Him be there with me.
For once in a long while, I felt peaceful. Safe. Comforted.
In my life, I always feel the need to fix things quickly. Resolve the problem fast. Remove the pain now. The faster, the better.
Perhaps the reason I need to fix things fast is the pressure to ‘get it right’. If we’re sad, perhaps we were taught that we need to “stop crying, or else…”. In a group of friends, we may feel the pressure to conform to our friends’ behaviours; otherwise, we risk being ostracised. If we feel angry or frustrated, we may quickly lash out to feel ‘right’ with ourselves again.
But life is rarely that neat. Life is filled with question marks, unresolved arguments, unfinished chapters, and ‘what ifs’ in relationships. And still, in the midst of all these, Jesus promises us His peace.
Fr Elton shared that what we often see on the surface, such as our struggles, even our sinful patterns, is just the tip of the iceberg. Beneath them lie deeper needs and “wounds on our hearts” — the need for healing, for rest, for affirmation, for friendship, for authentic intimacy, and to be loved.
That helped me to pray more actively. Sitting beside Jesus, I asked Him what do I really want? Is it healing? Freedom from the shadow this wound casts over me? Strength to keep moving forward? Or simply His presence, because I am tired of carrying it alone?
What stayed with me most was this: sometimes, a wound feels too heavy to even pray about. In those moments, we don’t need to force ourselves. We can simply place our wound into Jesus’s hands, ask Him for His grace and healing, and trust Him with it. His resurrection and His life can do the impossible.
And even when we don’t have the words, the Spirit intercedes for us (Rm 8:26-27).
This Easter, we’re invited to resist the urge to have everything resolved immediately, what St Ignatius calls “agere contra”, to ‘act against’ our usual impulses. Instead, we can learn that we are no longer holding everything by ourselves. Let us allow Jesus’s peace to take root in our hearts.
“Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid.” Perhaps this is not a command to suppress fear, but a gentle beckoning to bring even our deepest wounds to Him, to rest in His presence, and to trust that His peace is already quietly at work within us.
(Today’s OXYGEN by Brenda Khoo)
Prayer: Dear Jesus, when my wounds feel too heavy to carry, help me to place them into Your hands. Teach me to trust that You are with us, even when we may struggle to feel it. Grant me the grace to rest in Your gentle peace. Amen.
Thanksgiving: Thank You, Jesus, for Your quiet and faithful presence. Thank you for always holding my wounds with love, patience, and peace. Amen.
OXYGEN 
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